Doodle attempt number 2

Do the doodle

I made a doodle for my friend Mariam awhile ago during our Chemistry period. I was not so paying attention to the discussion and my hand just kept on doing the strokes. This is my end product.

I'm not really good at this and I'm just an amateur but seeing my friend that she loves it so much and plans on putting it on a frame for her room, makes me feel really really good and proud. I'm gonna keep practicing and do a lot more. I will post it here when I finish it.

Professors can be friends with students too and talk about the most random things.

I like it when young professors randomly,  talk to his students about things unrelated to his subjects. Last Monday, January 31, 2011, he suddenly sat down with us and offered merienda. We first thought that he would join us outside but he suddenly reached for his wallet and handed a 500 peso bill to us and told us to buy food. 

Two of my friends went out to buy and bought 7 burgers and regular fries and coke plus some fishballs. We talked while we eat and it was fun. Talking about things and student problems against another, other professors, our love life and his love life, future plans and such. 

The coolest Physics professor ever. :)

The special two who went out and buy the munchies. :)

Altagracia and I. (with burgers.) :)

with my super friend. :)

I wish this would happen again.

Nail Marbling

I have always loved nail polish and just last week, I found this great tutorial posted by my friend about nail marbling. Nail marbling is.. I can't really explain it well. Just check out the photos.

Something like this.. Pretty right?

How to do this:

• Prepare a cup of water and different of nail polish for your design.
• Add a drop of each nail polish, one after the other, at the center of the water.
• Using a toothpick or a stick, use it to alter your marble design. Just like shown in the picture.

• Then dip your nail in the water and remove the excess nail polish using the stick. Do it slowly and carefully.

Here's a video if you don't get my explanation. Lol

I tried doing this a lot of times but its really hard and I don't get it. Everytime I do it, the same outcome is happening. Its all messy and I dont know. Just like this.

That's not my nail by the way. But it looks like that.

There's also a tutorial for nail marble without using water but its just like painting your nails. Try doing it. Goodluck. :)

No smoking

My parents actually doesn't know that I was smoking. Only my friends know that I'm an occasional smoker, if there is such a term. I never really liked smoking but it somehow relaxes me whenever I feel nervous and it makes me all hyped. I only smoke when we go on clubs. Yes, I drink and smoke at the same time which is really bad for my health. But I just ignore it for a night and I just have fun.

I only smoke three brands of cigarette.

Marlboro Lights whenever were on club. I don't bring cigs in our house to keep because it would be easily seen by the maid and my grandmother. I sometimes use this too on school when I have a vacant time or before some presentations to cool and calm me down.

Black Bat. This is what I usually use in school because it leaves no smell on my mouth and it can be easily covered by a menthol candy. It saves me from getting caught by my boyfriend.

Esse. I could only use this when my mother comes home from abroad. This was her favorite cigarette aside from Phillip Morris. It saves me from going to a faraway store that doesn't know me so I could buy some cigarette. I like this cigarette because it was really thin and it looks really cute.

Frankly, I don't like people smoking. Its ironic I know because I smoke. Actually, I don't want to see my boyfriend smoke cigarettes. I thought it would be impossible at first because I know he's a good guy. But I saw him smoking during my 18th birthday and when I approached him, he hid the cigarette at his back and he can't speak to me because he haven't released the smoke from his mouth. He seemed a little ashamed at first until I told him it was okay. He doesn't know I was smoking. I thought it would be fair to let him so I said it was okay as long as he doesn't smoke in front of me. Then he told me that he promise to stop smoking. I told him its okay if he smokes but he insisted that he would stop for me. He even shaked my hand to make it into a  formal agreement. With that, I decided to stop smoking too. I don't want to be unfair to him so I am resisting as hard as I could. From whatever that day was onward, I'm a non-smoking person. 

My friends who knew I was smoking would probably laugh at me if they read this. Whatever. Things I could for him. Lol.

Reminiscing December

Taylor Swift - Back to December

The first time I heard of the song, it reminded me of my past relationship that ended in December. I currently having LSS with this song and so it made me reminisce the past.

In this song, the girl was saying sorry to the guy about some particular incident that happened in December, which is breaking up with him for no good reason. The girl then later realizes that she love the guy and she was asking for a second chance if possible. 

My story was different of course. I loved a guy when I was 14 and he was 21 at the time. I met him in some text networking channel where people post their cellphone numbers and it will be shown in the TV for the public to see. I know that I'm just a kid but we connect to a million of stuffs. I'm not really childish or immature when it comes to relationship. I remember him teasing me over the phone that I act and talk like I was the same age with him. Well, I get a little immature every now and then but he's also a little childish so its not really a big deal. It came to a time that my family knew about my secret boyfriend. My mother was not against it. She was actually speaking to the guy and they get along well. But my grandmother and other relatives were against it. It even came to a time that rumors were spread about me that my secret boyfriend and I were having sex and I would be pregnant soon. He love me and I can feel it and I loved him too. But I'm still a kid and I didn't fight for him. On the month of December, before Christmas, I spoke to him and told him that I can't take it any longer. He was crying over the phone and I told him that it was over for us.

Everytime I hear the song, I remember him. I want to say sorry to him for what I did to him. Just like what the song says, "He gave me all his love and all I gave was goodbye.". I want to apologize to him for not fighting for him and for becoming weak. I'm still a kid that time and I can't help it if I get scared. But I wouldn't be asking for a second chance. Just forgiveness. Somehow, that break-up made our lives better. Maybe we were just not meant to be with each other. I know he is happy now and I am too. If I fought for us before, would we be happy? Would we still be together? Maybe its just meant to be this way. Just friends. Besides, if not for that break-up, I wouldn't end up to my love today. My present boyfriend whom I love so deeply and my future.

Insecurities 101

I always believe that all people have their insecurities of course normally,  people just don't admit it easily. I have a lot of insecurities that I want to remove or somehow achieve so that I would stop being insecured. Let me make a list of these whatnots.

I'm insecured with thin people because they get to wear almost everything without looking stupid. I mean, they could wear small clothes which flaunts their body and they could also wear oversized shirts which looks cute. Well, I'm not really fat or anything but I'm not sexy either. I'm really having troubles with clothes. For my body, I really have fat arms and legs and it makes me feel really conscious. To sum it up, I just wanna be thin, thin, thin, thin, thin!

But NO, I don't wanna be anorexic or anything. That's just plain stupid and I have no intentions to die early from starvation. I don't really get why some girls are anorexic. I know they are obsessed of being thin and getting fat is what they hate the most but I still don't get it. If you're asking by the way if I tried some diet to get the body I want .. Well, I did try but I tend to disobey my own rules and you can say that I quit diet after 3 weeks. Exercise would be good too but, I'm a sleepyhead and I have a hard time waking up early in the morning.

Isn't she pretty? :">  <3

I'm insecured with pretty people. Lol. Nahh! I'm already contented with my face I just want to get my skin to be lighter and glowing and free from white heads. Lol. I actually like pretty girls and I have a crush on Natalie Portman since I was 14.

I'm insecured with girls with long wavy brunette hair. I have a long black hair and I use dye to make my hair brown. I actually apply some after 3 months or so. When I was a kid, I have a really thick and dry hair. If you'd check it and have a closer look, you would think that every hair strand I have dead. I just had treatments to improve it. I had it rebonded and now, I want to permanently curl or wave my hair and achieve that messy curly hair I want. I could do it anytime but my dad's acting all bitchy and he doesn't want me to do it. Well I think that he just don't want to pay for it. Lol. Seriously, he acts like he owns my hair. :|

Yup, I want Brenda Song's hair in that picture. :)

Seriously, I just need confidence and a little of hard work and I know I could achieve all this but I'm a person with a really thin patience and I want it as soon as I want it. I don't know if I could do this. Maybe I should put up posts with my diet. Gahh!